ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Sorry my hands just texted you
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
