I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
