Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
