just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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