sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
