The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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