i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Enjoy the penises
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
