C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
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I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
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