farters have to be the big spoon...
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
