best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
