No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
