very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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