her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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