I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
