Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
