the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered