Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
