So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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