Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
