i would punch a child for taco bell
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
