Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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