Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
