Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
