hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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