My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i just google imaged poop.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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