I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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