Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
