The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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