Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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