I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
