i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
We're too hungover to prance.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
