this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
