I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
