I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
