Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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