I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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