I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
