shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
