you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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