I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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