Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
