Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize