I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
