have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
