My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Michael Bay diarrhea
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize