there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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