I hope mine doesn't look like that
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
