I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
