She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
