brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
