We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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